ONALASKA, TX—In a bizarre turn of events, local resident Billy Bob Jenkins found himself in hot water with the law after attempting to teach a group of squirrels square dancing in the town square. Witnesses reported that Jenkins, a self-proclaimed animal enthusiast, had set up a makeshift dance floor complete with miniature cowboy hats and tiny boots for the squirrels to wear.
According to Police Chief Bubba Johnson, Jenkins’ antics caused quite a commotion in the usually peaceful town of Onalaska. “We received multiple complaints from residents about the loud music and shouting coming from the square,” Johnson stated. “When officers arrived on the scene, they found Mr. Jenkins twirling around in circles, trying to get the squirrels to do-si-do.”
Despite Jenkins’ insistence that the squirrels were having a blast, authorities deemed his actions to be disruptive and issued him a citation for disturbing the peace. “While we appreciate Mr. Jenkins’ enthusiasm for wildlife, we must prioritize the well-being of our community,” Chief Johnson explained.
When reached for comment, Jenkins defended his actions, claiming that he was simply trying to bring joy to the local wildlife. “Them squirrels seemed mighty interested in learning some moves,” Jenkins said. “I reckon they just ain’t had the right teacher yet.”
In the wake of the incident, eastexasnews.com and polkcountytoday.com have been buzzing with speculation about the implications of Jenkins’ squirrel square dancing escapade. Some locals have even suggested hosting a community square dance event to raise awareness for wildlife conservation.
As for Jenkins, he has vowed to continue his mission to educate the animal kingdom in the art of dance, undeterred by the legal repercussions. “I ain’t giving up on them squirrels,” Jenkins declared. “Next time, I’ll make sure to get a permit first.”